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Wednesday, July 1st, 2009
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5:49 pm - Re-Emergence
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I really didn't realize it has been so long since I posted anything here. I do realize that it has been awhile since I posted anything anywhere...
So, HI to friends I haven't connected with in awhile and sorry I just vanished there for awhile. Basically the deal is that I have had quite a bit to deal with over the last oh 6 years and instead of dealing, I pushed it all down in order to function in my life. Yep, 6 years of stuff all piled up and I basically broke from it all shortly following Dragon*Con '08. I needed to withdraw for awhile and focus on healing past hurts and allowing all those feelings that I've been pushing away to come out. I realized that my crap was starting to negatively affect relationships with people that I really love and respect. So, I just shut out the world for awhile so that I wouldn't damage friendships with my issues. A few certain people in my life decided that they weren't going to let me shut them out regardless and I appreciate that they wouldn't let me totally disappear. I realized that there was only so much healing I could do on my own. I've been surrounded by some awesome people and I appreciate everything!!
I'm doing much better now. I've cleaned a lot of crap out of my closet so to speak. I'm looking forward to reconnecting with friends again. Don't be shy...LOL!!
current mood:  peaceful
current music: Lacuna Coil
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| Sunday, October 7th, 2007
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10:21 am - Doors Close, Doors Open
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My mother always told me that sometimes a person has to let go of old ties in order to grow. Recently, that lesson has come around again for me. A friendship that I spent almost 7 years nurturing ended a couple of months ago. I tried to hang on to the friendship for as long as I could...Making excuses for why we just didn't click like we use to. In the end, I have to admit, our friendship died because we are simply moving in different directions and in order to grow, I had to let her go. It is amazing the things we see when we remove our rose-colored glasses. When we finally admit to ourselves that this relationship we're in has become stagnant. The only way to keep growing is to let go of those relationships that hold us back to the point of deliberately trying to stop us from growing instead of allowing room for change. I found myself defending passionately the validity of my connection and relationship with my Twin who I just met in June. I had to defend my Twin's character and to make it clear to my old friend that this person is a part of my life now and she would have to learn to accept it. Obviously as I write this, she didn't...There were other reasons and happenings as well but this was the one that removed my rose-colored glasses. The doors closed on our friendship.
Doors open...Last Saturday, I began Massage Therapy school. I am so excited! This is right up my alley. So September 30, 2008 I will graduate and become certified in 3 disciplines. Reflexology, Swedish Massage, and Neuro-Muscular Therapy (NMT). The state of Georgia requires a license to practice, and I have to take a national exam after these steps are taken care of, I will be able to practice Massage Therapy. YAY!
Also, I can see the doors opening for Seth & I to further our Shamanic Practice. I can see the work that we've been putting into our practice, silently, begin to have a voice. It is scary as hell for both of us but we've learned that to deny our destiny costs us much more than owning and living it.
There are other doors opening as well and all lead to great possibilities. I am seeing friendships that I am meant to cultivate take root and blossom, being nurtured in the correct way, and I can see them growing into something really beautiful. I also intend to reach out to those I met just briefly at The Gather, who resonated with me in some way. I apologize to you guys for not keeping up with you lately. Please email me at lady_andarael@msn.com. I'm also on Yahoo as andarael_bloodheart32 so add me to your YIMs.
current mood:  hopeful
current music: Through The Glass, Stone Sour
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| Tuesday, July 10th, 2007
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5:02 pm - Things That Make You Ask "WTF?"
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Before I start my bitch-fest for this LJ session let me say that I LOVE Atlanta. A few reasons: I can go out at 1AM and find decent food. On my way to work, I pass 6 Starbucks and never have to miss my coffee. Dragon*Con, SELF, Whippersnappers, 1763, the Masquerade, and other deviant places to have fantastic fun. I have some wonderful friends here. One can always find something to do here. Little 5 Points! I could go on and on and on!
There are a few things I really could do without in Atlanta...The main thing...TRAFFIC! OMFG it is an absolute nightmare sometimes...Ok all of the time during certain hours. I live approximately 20 miles from work. It can take me 45 minutes to over an hour to get there and home depending on my travel time.
I hate mornings anyway. It is rare that I actually come to life before noon. Unfortunately, I have to be at work at 7AM. This morning on my way to work, I almost got rear-ended AND side-swiped by the same damn woman! Ok we were in the line of cars yielding to oncoming traffic waiting to take the ramp on to GA 400. This insane woman decides to attempt to edge over to the left of me as if she is going to go around me and the other 7 cars in front of me to access the ramp. AS IF! Then when we finally made it onto the highway she suddenly decides that she wants to be in my lane. Rather than speed up to move ahead or slow down to move behind she starts trying to occupy my exact place in the damn lane! I blew the horn for all it was worth and proceeded to call her everything except for a child of the gods at the same time wishing I had automatic weapons/explosives/anything that goes boom. She finally decided that I wasn't giving up my spot and sped ahead attempting to move into the lane to her left almost side-swiping yet another driver.
Needless to say, I spent the first part asking WTF?!
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| Saturday, June 30th, 2007
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6:28 pm - More Randomness
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Hi again to all! Seth & I are finally sort of getting back into the grind around here. However, we have both determined that this is all quite temporary until we move into that next phase of existence which is coming very soon for many (some of you reading this will know exactly what I mean).
I noticed while looking over my last post that I failed to say something that I totally meant to say. Thank you to everyone at the HK Gather who made it all such a surreal experience. I enjoyed meeting everyone and I know that my life has been enriched by being in the company of such fascinating creatures. I hope that everyone is feeling good and is doing well.
I have managed to do quite a bit of introspection over the last week and have made some interesting decisions about where my life is heading and the direction in which I want it to go. I have realized that I had been sitting idly by allowing circumstance to dictate my life. I have been responding to change and situations rather than creating the change and situations I WANT. While I do realize that not everything is within my control, I also know that I can control more than I thought.
So, as I progress from thoughts into actions I will keep you posted as to what's going on. Oh and here is my email addy (lady_andarael@msn.com) and my YIM (andarael_bloodheart32)for everyone who wants it.
In Twilight,
Andarael
current mood:  determined
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| Thursday, June 28th, 2007
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7:29 pm - Much Randomness
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Hello to all! I can't believe it has been so long since I posted anything. I've been quite busy with all sorts of things. This past weekend I attended the House Kheperu Annual Gather and had an amazing, interesting time. Needless to say, I have returned to Atlanta a different being than I was. I discovered that I have a "twin", got myself "reconnected", and went through a Death & Rebirth Rite.
Since I have returned, I've managed to knock things over while standing at least two feet away from them. I have fried both smoke detectors in my house. Every time I get near the computers at work they slow down and it even froze up on me today. Batteries have NO chance. I'm also having some strange dreams and what I think are memories are trickling into my brain.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining at all! I have been waiting to be reconnected for YEARS! I know I have some kinks to work out and some things to get use to but it's really the price you pay when you ask for extensive energy work.
current mood:  awake
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| Wednesday, September 13th, 2006
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7:33 pm - The Death of the Energizer Bunny
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NO! The pink fluffy disgusting bunny that so annoyingly bangs his drum on the TV commercials advertising Energizer batteries is not dead, unfortunately...Unless the Energizer battery is attempting to supply power to just about anything I happen to own.
Where I work, I have an amazing boss lady who allows us to use MP3 players to listen to our music without disturbing others. I have to use AAA batteries to make my music play. I've noticed that I go through more batteries in a DAY than others around me do in a week! Yesterday morning as I was replacing yet another battery, I decided to count how many batteries I replaced through this afternoon. I work 10 hours a day and I do not use the player constantly throughout the work day. In this time, I ate 2 Energizers and 1 Duracell. I think I may buy stock in one or both of these companies...I'd still like to push that pink bunny off a cliff with a very steep drop.
current mood:  amused
current music: NIN-Perfect Drug
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